Un-torn

Wow - just had my first cup of coffee (with caffeine) in two weeks and holy crap, my heart is going to beat out of my chest! Just thought I would share that with you :)

Anyway, I just wanted to thank you all for your advice. I have made a decision.

I quit EA today, before I even started. I decided over the weekend that this was the right thing to do and I feel a million times better, like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders.

Sure, now I'm taking a risk that I will get the film job, and if I don't, who knows how long it will take to get another job. But this risk makes me feel 100% better than the "sure" thing. Yes, EA would have provided money but I just couldn't fathom quitting on them. I just would feel so terrible that I would rather not put myself in that situation.

I figure that it might take me two weeks or so to find another job - but those two weeks are ones I would have to face at any rate, once the contract was over. And I know that if I worked at EA, I would always wonder if I should have been patient and waited for a full-time position in something I wanted to do - and would have had the weight of not knowing if my contract would be extended over the next six months. After all, Kass was right, they have been known to screw over employees and despite how hard I might have worked, I wouldn't have been suprised if I was still let go at the end.

So, I've decided to risk it all on something else. My gut, my instincts and my faith tells me that I am doing the right thing, and though I am in a very scary position at the moment, for some reason I feel like I'm going to be OK.