Calling all Bloggers:
As we all know, the blog world is a temperamental one. We all blog for our own reasons...some of us blog about our daily happenings ("Funny thing happened to me on the way to work today"), some blog about our opinions ("Why dating in the city sucks"), some blog about love lives or lack there of("So I'm still not getting any...), some blog to share stories and travels ("My feet hurt after walking in Paris all day"), and a lot of us blog for all these reasons combined.
This is what blogging is. It is self-publishing, a WeBlog...we decide what gets written, we decide what we want to say and we can have the whole world listen. This is the beauty of blogging, is it not?
Lately, my blog has been beseiged by an anonymous commentor. This commentor stumbled across my blog one day after I posted a comment on a Beyond Robson post (a Vancouver Community Blog which I am in talks to actually start blogging for). He read a travel post of mine, decided he didn't like what he read and left a malicious comment. I took note of his IP address and left it at that.
Days later, he returned to another post...one that was just about Ross's Birthday and decided that this was a good place to have his opinion heard. If you would like to read his inane comments, you can click here.
As he went on with comments such as "keep trying to make those cuffs and collars match. lol" (wtf does that even mean?), "Boring life, boring blog. I'd be drinking like you too if I had that life." and "If you really want to be a writer, you should give something with more depth? Right now its frivolous and extremely light." (sorry, I'm saving my suicide poems for another blog), he pretended to be other people too...not clever enough to realize that careful deduction and my site meter had him pegged as the same person each time.
While he was annoying because, A) it didn't make too much sense and B) shut up already, what he was saying wasn't getting to me.
Why? Because frankly, I don't care if he doesn't think I'm a good writer or not because, hey who asked him and, well, I must be doing something right for him to keep coming back like this. He was obviously bitter, as Rachel pointed out.
Then he came out with this beauty of a comment, one that wasn't just about me but about all blogger's in general:
"Um, I'm not that anonymous individual or dg that you were talking about.(Um, yes you are and I love you Sitemeter!!!)
My name is Julian. Did I miss a rule that says I must submit all my personal info somewhere? Seriously. Or did you just want attempt a blog for 'friends' to read and comment on because it sure is looking that way?
I just saw that anonymous/dg person made a remark that touched off quite alot of comments back. And I was just trying to see it from all angles. You know, outside the box type of thing. Thats it. Thats all, really.
I am starting to see it from that person's side though now unfortunately, about touching a nerve or whatever. Hmm.
You don't seem like the kind that would fence yourself in?
I certainly hope none of you are this vicious in real life.
And really in a sense aren't we all anonymous and contradicting ourselves by not submitting quite everything.?
I mean thats a discussion within itself, we write for all kinds of reasons, ultimately we would like someone to read blogs we, ourselves have written but as long as its at arms length, then everything should be ok, right? But how true is that, to even ourselves?
We all seem to be contradicting ourselves on blogs, no matter how open and clever we think we are for the world to read.
There are jobs we are protecting ourselves from by not writing about certain things, secrets from partners, etc.
My question is, when does the real writing begin with us ALL?"
What do you think about that? Apparently, as writers and bloggers we have a certain job to do...a job according to him. Funny, when I signed up for a blogger account, I don't recall have to sign a form that said we all had to write about certain things...
Anyway, I decided the best thing to do would be to ignore him. What this guy wanted/wants is attention and I really didn't want to give it to him.
That was until I noticed a hell of a lot of hits coming into my blog...over 140 in a day, 20 the last hour! Holy hell! And all from the Discover Vancouver Forum, a local message board for the city where I found the following forum: "Crappy Vancouver Blogs" and a direct link to my blog.
Unbelievable.
This person has SUCH a grudge against me that they actually went out of their way to start a forum on how much my blog sucks! It's sorta funny but mainly just sad and a wee bit creepy.
Especially since the people who were coming to my blog were reading it for a few minutes and leaving and not going back to the Vancouver Forum, or not even reading my blog at all...and yet, suddenly I get all these negative comments. ...hmmm. Strange how people who weren't even reading my blog were leaving these comments that all sound a bit...familiar.
My theory is that yes, I'm sure some people have a problem with my blog but this one PYSCHO is probably leaving most of them.
Why? Because no one on my blog would ever agree with him, but he can start his own blog of such and then make it seems like lots of people really DO agree with him.
Sad, scary and unnerving...and yet I was still willing to ignore it.
Until he started stealing pics off of my blog and posting them up there for people to make fun of.
That's going too far.
You can make hateful comments about my blog from your online soapbox (while remaining deliciously anonymous) but seriously, when you bring my picture in to it, that's getting extremely scary.
I feel like Hilary Duff, Madonna or Jodie Foster...I just hope this guy isn't going to track me down and then go and shoot a President for me (although, maybe I wouldn't be that gutted about Bush...kidding ;)
I know that when you aren't anonymous that there can be some problems associated with it. Yes, people might know who you are and yes not everyone is going to like you...such is life.
But I never in a million years, thought that someone I don't know would detest me and my blog so much that they would go out of their way to try and make a point...and the thing is, I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THE POINT IS!
There's not much I can do, except that Vancouver Forum will take that down soon because making fun of someone in the city just for spite isn't exactly something that's discussion worthy.
It's just plain sad.
The thing I don't understand though is, why me?
My blog isn't controversial (not too much anyway). I have lots of readers, everyone (ha, except one) seems to enjoy it and I get nothing but postitive feedback.
I find it amazing that little ol' me has the power to infuriate someone so much that they have made it their life's mission to try and bring me down.
Well, you can post my picture up all you like baby, because perhaps a little fame and notoriety is all I need to cement myself in the blogging world.
So, what do all of you think? Am I alone on this? I know Steph got recognized at the airport and she's not even anonymous! Anyone else had to deal with jealous psychos because of their blog?
And is this the kind of things all Bloggers should potentially prepare for?
(and by the way, you can read my stalker's pointless and city-wide post HERE.)
42 comments:
I don't have a blog, and I've never commented in yours before, but I'm shocked by this person's nastiness, and I hope they give up and go away soon.
I'm really enjoying all your entries. It was fun and interesting to read about your time away in Europe and I hope you can get back to normal with your blog soon.
It's very brave of you to include your photos - they make your blog so much more relatable and enjoyable.
Best of Luck!
I honestly don't get what this guy/girl's problem is! You're pretty, you're nice, you have morals, you're funny, you're not in any way shape or form conceited, you're interesting, you talk about your problems (so are not "perfect"), you're in love with your bf, you don't aim to insult other people in your posts, your blog isn't just about one thing (you have variety), you write well, you take great pictures and you stick up for things that you believe in. I just don't get it!
I don't mean to be a bit creepy but maybe s/he's obsessed with you or jealous - s/he sounds stalkerish. :(
I haven't had problems with people hassling me in this way but I did have someone email me and tell me that he was "obsessed with me" and went on to say a few other things. I mean if you "say it" like that then whoa, there's a problem going on there. It wasn't on the blog I have now (haha, as if anyone would be obsessed with the world's biggest dork) it was another one which had different kind of content. It totally freaked me out though. I haven't been able to go back to that blog.
Um, this dude is just WEIRD. I would say to ignore him, but with something that annoying it's hard to let it go.
Weird, weird, weird, weird, weird.
And petty. Shouldn't he be busy trying to lead his own life rather than obsessing about other peoples'? Especially in cyberspace?
The word doucheba springs to mind, actually.
Sounds to me like anonymous (if that IS his real name) is a fellow blogger that just can't get any traffic to his blog and knows that he can't get a woman like you in real life.
I've only gotten a couple of negative posts, and I simply used my blogger comment moderating power to make them disappear. (If they had been negative AND sensible in any way, I would have approved them.)
You've already given this goof the attention that he was craving. Time to put him on permanent "ignore."
Oh, and I mean this with much respect, but pictures of you floating around the internet is going to do NOTHING to hurt your site traffic.
i'm so sorry that they're being so rude. and pointless. some people are just so hateful for absolutely no reason.. why would he/she bother with all of that needless negative energy?
i haven't had anything negative - but that may just be because about 2.4 people read my blog :)
Wanderlust: you know some people are just utter arses with lives so shallow that they have nothing better to do but hide behind the anonymity of the web and be mean to others. I know it is easy to say ‘ignore it’ because it is hurtful but I am afraid that is what you will have to do. I think both of your blogs are great, you don’t try and be anything that you are not, your writing is fun, frank, without pretension, the pictures are great and I enjoy reading it. Please don’t let the odd sad low-life put you off, keep on blogging!
Hey, there's no such thing as bad publicity right? Well, until a stalker shows up naked in your front yard.
hmmm, I no longer know what my opinion is. As, I was reading your post I was like oh my God this guy is nutso and I did read his comments as they came, on Ross's b-day post. But, I think you are making too much of it. I think you should choose to delete or moderate/review your comments or not. If I was you, I wouldn't care about the whole forum thing because alot of it is not that negative. Most people are saying that you must be his ex something for him ot be making fun of you and the rest are saying how pretty you are. If you're not happy with that then you should have just quietly had it deleted, IMHO. I think the two of you are acting like some over aged highschool students.
Oh ya, yesterday I saw a girl wearing a shirt that said "Nobody cares what your blog says." I thought that was so funny!
M said...
I honestly don't get what this guy/girl's problem is! You're pretty, you're nice, you have morals, you're funny, you're not in any way shape or form conceited, you're interesting, you talk about your problems (so are not "perfect"), you're in love with your bf, you don't aim to insult other people in your posts, your blog isn't just about one thing (you have variety), you write well, you take great pictures and you stick up for things that you believe in. I just don't get it!
I agree with this but remember preception is everything.
I agree with carrie.
You need to either just delete his comments, or moderate all comments, and just post after reading..
This guy is an A-hole, and his stupid
stuff wont stop..
And get a login to that board he started and start posting YOUR blog THERE!
that'll show him t (or will it?)
I have no comment either way about your "fanboy". But I have to say, even a quick glance at your blog makes my back teeth ache. You are beyond verbose.
Anyone else had to deal with jealous psychos because of their blog?
I don't know. You been around my blog lately?
:-)
Carrie, "I think the two of you are acting like some over aged highschool students." I agree but I think trying to defend yourself is understandable. Yes she could choose to ignore it or make a post about it and she chose the last one. I didn't find anything about this post to be immature, it is a real point because all you bloggers are putting yourselves out there on the line and its interesting to see how extreme some anonymous people take it. People being little shits for fun isnt cool and I dont think anyone deserves or expects that.
Like Peter said, the best way to deal with anon trolls is to ignore them. Just tell them once that they will be ignored in all future posts and that's it.
And don't let the whole issue of blogging celebrity change who you are and what you blog... keep it real. :thumbs up:
I had a blog troll that migrated from someone elses blog to my blog so I posted his IP address on my blog. I got all kinds of threats from him saying that he was contacting the FBI and that it was illegal (which was all untrue).
I did something stupid and gave him the attention that he was craving. It backfired and he became ruder and more vitrolic on my blog.
Thank goodness that he stopped but it was hard to deal with sometimes.
The best advice has already been given.
Ignore, Ignore, Ignore.
I LOVE your blog. I can't say that about most blogs. This idiot is just that - an idiot. There's always one (or more) lurking around isn't there. Keep up the great writing and try to ignore the losers!! You're awesome!
I DONT think you are acting like a highschooler or that you are overeacting.
The best thing to do would be to ignore, IF it was all on your blog. This is your home turf and you are comfortable here!
But when the person goes and makes a thing about it elsewhere, that totally smacks of desperation.
And desperate people can be scary. i would be a bit worried if I were you! Not trying to scare you but...
I think it was good to post about it because now people who click on that dumb link can read the whole story and they too see it makes no sense. no wonder you only have one negative comment here but tons of there? No one agrees with that guy except him and maybe some other trolls who would be just bastards anyway. Like "Not Impressed" said, they dont even give it more than a glance, so how can they draw any real conclusions??? THEY CAN'T! It's all for show, just to be jerks, no real meaning.
I would even suggest to take the forum down (if you can) but as eric said, all publicity is good publicity.
After all NONE Of the comments on that forum make ANY SENSE! They are just cheap shots and soooooooo laughable. They are just saying it to get a reaction...there is no validity or merit in them at all and that is OBVIOUS to everyone.
Ride it out and keep being awesome.
This is about more than your blog and not even about you.
This person is sick, unloved, ugly, desperate, bitter, jealous, obsessed and many other things. He just found an unfortunate outlet for all of that. If it wasn't you it would be someone else!!!!!
Like me! Why doesn't anyone come and bug me lol! I wanna stalker!
He's just a twat that doesn't deserve the time of day, but I dont think it's wrong to make a blog entry out of it. It was good reading, as always, and as long as its not a regular thing (e.g. giving him attention) then I don't see whats wrong with it. It's better than keeping it all in and getting all wired and upset about it.
He/She's just a twat anyway, and quite frankly, I think he may just be continuing the fight to a) rile you up and b) because he knows that he's in the wrong and you've got a foot over him. It's like someone getting back at you for teaching them a lesson by just being better than them.
:)
Well. He's just a bit jealous but what he doesn't seem to realize is that posting hatred for someone just makes them even more famous. Duh! Paris Hilton and Nicole Ritchie made a freakin empire based on this!
So, keep doing what you do (entertain/inform us. Screw him.
Oh. And, stick a little copyright thing on your blog and he can't touch any of it. If he does, you can sue him/have him arrested for infringement. Even your pics.
I don't think you are overreacting.
It's extremely juvenile for the person to act the way he/she does, but agree with everyone. As much as it sucks, you sometimes just have to ignore the trolls.
I think it is sad really. To think that someone would waste their energy on crap like that.
The nice thing about the internet is that you can "meet" like minded people... be encouraging and build others up.
Ok, there is room for "heated" debate, but not for personal attack.
If you don't like a particular blog/ person.. simply move on...
Frankly Wander, both your blogs are a great read.
Interesting thing about that forum is that you are right, all the comments do sound the same.
"You're a drunk, blonde, not a writer"-same old stuff.
I think its just one or two people over and over again.
Sad thing is they think the rest of us cant tell the difference.
Anyway - though u dont need telling but - you arent a drunk -not least i can tell from your blog - you are blonde but are also a writer.
You should take that "one day" thing off of your profile and just call yourself one.
Youve had articles published. That makes you a writer to me.
hope you overcome this madness!~
Well I for one LOVE your blog. I think you are fantabulous and all the other wonderful things that other people have said about you too. The only difference is, I am miserable right now because I have no nicotine in my body and I'm still saying nice things.
Been there and done that. Firstly sweetgirl, disable anon comments. Don't give the cowards or "keyboard cowboys" as i like to call these trolls, the darkness the need to hide in.
If they want to defame you,make the sad fucks sign up to blogger first.
Secondly, for this type of troll you really HAVE to moderate your comments. I know that sucks, but it has to be done. By allowing these mindless gimps a voice you are encouraging them.
All trolls are just retarded dicks who have no life outside of cyber space. They thrive in online communities where they feel they can be/do/say whatever they need to, to make them feel better about their own purile, real life existance.
Don't feed the trolls! Shut these motherfuckers down!!
It's interesting but I do think that this might be something u might have to prepare for as a blogger.
It is funny that I always thought I was exempt from this sort of nonsense since i do not blog about anything remotely "controversial" but then again, neither do u.
It could happen to any of us and it does.
Rarely have i seen it at this level though.
Maybe all blogger should prepare for the crazies - and I mean the real crazies.
It for me has always been anonymous trolls leaving comments and that I can ignore.
But this is something that is beyond ur blog. It's not even on ur blog anymore, the person has taken it to another level - another site, one which u have no control over.
All u can do is hope it dies down.
Though this prat sounds sick in the head so that may not happen anytime soon.
Of course our responses here might be egging him on, but u know what I don't care, I hope he gets it in his head that he is a pathetic WANKER and no one cares what he has to say.
First things first, understand that you can't explain crazy and crazy is clearly what you're dealing with here. Def disable anon comments and keep the word verification up and of course moderate (at least all three for a little while). Make the bastard work for it if he or she wants to be such an assclown.
I've had to deal with crap like this for more years than I care to admit. Anytime you are on the internet you are gonna get crazies. I haven't had to deal with it on my blog (maybe your freak will come visit me now) but I've had more than my fair share. In the beginning I used to love to argue but as they say, "Arguing with idiots is pointless , they will drop you to their level and kill you with experience" so the best stance is to ignore.
Know this though, you do have rights and there is such a thing as cyberstalking. Also, anytime harassment crosses state or country lines the FBI can get involved. I bet his/her ISP has a great TOS agreement and they would be more than happy to yank him/her as a client.
I'm sorry you are even having to waste a minute thinking about this loser especially since this is prob their only claim to fame.
Oh and I couldn't resist one more snarky quote...
So many freaks, not enough sideshows
Anonymous = coward.
If you're going to make a comment, at least have the balls to put your name to it.
I'd lose the Anonymous sign in option if I were you.
To Everyone - Thanks so much for the support. It was so nice to hear all your different opinions and even nicer to see people who've never commented before. Keep it up!
I completely agree with the whole moderating comments thing, however...
The person is no longer commenting on my blog (for now). Like someone said, this is my home turf and if they want to bring their petty remarks here, fine. And yup I can always choose to moderate comments if it gets to that. It's still an option...at least to get rid of anonymity.
But the point is that they have brought their comments elsewhere, to a forum on another site about my city.
So as you can see, it doesn't really matter what I do here, this person is obviously sick enough to go out of their way to make a whole website devoted to me.
What's even sicker, is that if you actually read the comments on that forum, it's so obviously the same person almost everytime. Same point(?), same style of writing, everytime.
He/she thinks they get away with it there because they aren't under the scrutiny of my sitemeter.
However, they are so delusional that they think we can't tell.
Which cements the growing theory that it's just a 13-year old kid.
Anyway, yes it's very creepy to have someone this obsessed with me (even if they are just 13) but on the plus side I've never gotten so many hits! Maybe there is no such thing as bad publicity...gotta look on the bright side.
Plus, I do have their IP address, if worse comes to worse.
I've also gotten tons of nice emails from a lot of you, which is wonderful. Thanks so much.
And there is a BIG bright side...I'll post about it in awhile so be sure to look back for it, but some pretty cool things happened to me today.
So thanks again to you all, even though I mainly blog for myself, I'm so happy to have so much support and it lets me know I am on the right track because so many people read my daily yappings.
Blogging may bring out the worst in people, but in also brings out the best.
And please, if anyone else has some pyschotic troll stories, I would love to hear them.
I had anonymous psychos for a very short time before I turned off the option of commenting anonymously. I hated doing that, but I just wasn't willing to tolerate the random drive-by shootings.
Listen, you're young, beautiful, and traveling the world. This is bound to arouse jealousy in petty people. And on the internet they often feel free to take cheap shots at the object of their jealousy. It's just so easy to do. But you're handling it well and the fact that they've started a website devote solely to slamming on you means you must be pretty popular. That's a rare level of devotion, even if he is trying to act as if he dislikes you. A guy doesn't spend that much time stealing photos of a girl and writing about her unless he has at least some attraction to her. I mean, I slam on Rosie O'Donnell all the time, but you don't see me creating a website for her. This guy most likely has a thing for you, but he's a jerk so he expresses it in a nasty way. When you handle it with class you just reaffirm what we already thought about you, that you are a classy person. So in the end, despite the aggravation, you are the winner.
I hope this makes some sense. I'm a bit tired so I'm not sure if I'm expressing my thoughts here as well as I think I am.
Nice Steve, thanks for the very kind words.
I think you might be on to something...it's probably some young kid in love...or a scary lesbian...or just one of these run of the mill nutters that run wild in this cracked out city.
The Net is a breeding ground for envious, immature people who hide behind computer screens. Sad but true. It's nice though that you think I handle it with class. ;) It's definitely been a interesting day.
Most of the guys that I date are psychotic trolls...and that's a fact!
OMG. What an asshole!. I can't believe it! Those are the red flags of lifeless people. Period.
Has he ever heard this song that says:
ITS MY PARTY AND I CRY IF I WANT TO?
He's the best unpaid PR person ever.
Everyone's a winner, Lusty.
You get to write about interesting blog-topics.
You look to be the bigger, rational person.
He's promoting your blog.
He's still a dick.
I dunno, if you don't take it personally, there's nothing but upside.
Just a thought.
-Wombat
Wow. Now I've seen it all. Petty drama used to be reserved for "real life", not the blog world. I'm amazed at people. I truly am.
I like that nickname for you, "lusty"
I forgot to ask...
Did you EVER see the poem I wrote for you over at the Automated poetry machine about your date with Ross (and David Coperfield")?
The link is here ( The Automated Poetry Machine)
Markb in nj
This is the kind of shit that ruins the whole blogging experience. Good for you for combatting this asshole. I've had a few come my way and it's so petty. You'd think they'd just move on to another blog or start their own blog and bitch there. That would however require effort so instead they terrorize you. So sorry to hear about this. You've got tons of support!
I am so sorry you have had to go through all this. It i so unfair that one jealous person (and that what they is jealous...because since all of the comments have been annon. or other fake names, they don't have their own blog link attached so they obviously are not as creative as you and need to try to siphon off some of your greatness to make themselves feel whole.) I think you have dealt with the situation in a mature manner and I do not blame you for being upste that he took your picture and posted them on a forum. That is certainly ause for alarm.
I hope he is gone for good and remember you have too many who love your writing and your blog!
this is shit! im so sorry you went through this, i dont think you are over-reacting, i think its scary and unecessary. I agree with your later post about this being anon's only 'real' life, therefore its hard to convince them of reality.
it sounds very much like anon is jealous, you are interesting and funny and hottt ... now you can also show your strength. fuck him.
ps. i sorta lurk after reading your funny comments on eileen or kiss n blog ... but your sitemeter should show that!! (YAY SITEMETER!)
If you read any of the forum, it seems as if the only reason people post on it is for spewing their acidic views.
It always makes me laugh that someone who doesn't seem to like what you are writing will still take the time to come back to your blog, and then spend their time talking about how much they dislike you etc etc. Not sure about you, but if there's something I don't like, I just won't read it again. Period.
It happened to me, and then the troll simply vanished to stalk some other soul. It is sadly part of the whole blogging process, as there are some people who just have a social ineptness and are happier when they are trying to make everyone as miserable as them.
Wow. I just caught up. Well said.
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