The curse of the Louboutins

It's fall. I'm unemployed and I don't eat much.

All of the above lead to compulsive, impulsive shopping habits with money that I don't have. Add a dash of insecurity about my flawed feet and you get one big mess of designer shoes.

I bought the most awesome pair of Marc Jacobs boots off of Ebay the other day. They were so awesome that I actually started drooling when I saw them. For realz. You know how I love my boots.

The price tage though was $365, which was a heck of a lot but considering it was orignally $1075, I figured it was a good deal.

It didn't stop there though. I moved onto Christian Louboutins, the re-soled, uber-sexy and uber-pricey shoes that fashionistas covet.

I am not a fashionista but I decided to covet them anyway.

I tried on a patent leather, kitten heeled pair at Holt Renfrew and immediatley felt elated. Magic shoes. Magic shoes with status soles that would erase all insecurities and hardships that I have felt about my feet. Magic shoes that would protect me at an upcoming wedding this weekend and make me forget about my ugly scars.

Magic shoes that cost $595.

I hemmed and hawed about it for a few days. In the end it came down to the fact that I was selling my car anyway so I would need some fabulous "walking" shoes. Plus giving up your car is hard - I needed to be consoled.

I bought the shoes and tried to not feel too sick about it.

But I did later. I could justify that price for amazing shoes if indeed the shoes were amazing (they looked amazing, I thought) and if I could wear them for a million years.

But the shoes were in fact CURSED~!

Already in the store, I walked around and the heel lift started to twist at the bottom. I couldn't feel it but when I looked at the shiny scarlet soles again, I saw it move. Immediatley I told the sales girl who took them down to the cobbler to be fixed.

20 minutes later I had the shoes and was assured that the heels would never move again.

Later that evening, I was helping the Rockstar move some stuff into my apartment (ah yes, moving day is approaching. More on that next post). The heel started to twist again.

And the shoes started slipping off my feet with every step.

So the next day I took the shoes back to Holt Renfrew and complained. They wouldn't take them back THE BASTARDS but they did send them off to get fixed, AGAIN, overnight so that I would have them for the wedding.

Next day I got the shoes back. I saw the lifts had been replaced (basically the rubber tip at the end of the heel). One problem down.

But they still fell off my feet, which for the life of me I can't understand since they fit in the store AND they are supposed to be sized small AND they are already half a size smaller than normal.

So I place insoles in them. Better. Except now my toes in the front were SO painfully squished together that I had to pad them all with bandaids and then some.

And the next day they were still slipping (though my toes weren't going anywhere). So I had to stick in heel liners too. This worked pretty good.

Until I was at the wedding and lost the heel liners. So my toes were painfully squished, the shoes slipped off with every step AND the stupid heel started twisting again! Now I know that these shoes are generally very well made but why did I have to get the defective pair? Punishment for spending a lot on shoes I guess but let me tell you, I have PAYLESS shoes that are millions of years old and they never had this trouble.
My shoes, me and the handsome Best Man
And then the actually lining of the shoe started coming unglued.

And then the icing on the cake? My boyfriend accidently spilled beer in them.

Good ol' beer puddle in my Christian Louboutins.

Now Holt Renfrew REALLY won't take them back, if not for that then for the soles which are all scratched up.

They are going up on Ebay tomorrow. If any of you are part of the occult and would like a pair of cursed shoes, please bid. You won't be sorry!