Saturday, December 23, 2006

Vive la hangover!

Even backpackers are stylish in Paris

I do not know if this blog will make any sense or how long this post will be because I am not only using the new Windows Vista but I am also at the mercy of a brutal hangover. Despite the copious ingestion of Tylenol and Gravol, the 10 hours of sleep, the hair of the dog which I just chugged down a moment ago, and the fact that it is 9 o'clock at night all seem to do nothing for my aching head, my pukey stomach and my overall sense of death and defeat.

Of course I should have seen this coming, suffering from jetlag and arriving just the other day from an extremely long journey of 25 hours or so. Thankfully, I am not the only one hungover. We are staying in Ross's sister Cat and her husband Chris's 300-year old flat in Lyon that overlooks the river Soane, and all of us are suffering under the mighty spell of way too much vino, rich Lyonaisse cuisine and unsuppresable Scottish spirit.

Anyway, as much as I would love to blog about what has happened to me in the last few days, my body tells me to quit in and go dig into the pizza that will be arriving downstairs at any moment. So instead I will break things down easily and quickly by the numbers:

Number of flights: 2
Number of times I wanted to kill the kids sitting in front of us on the plane: uncountable
Number of hours Ross went without a cigarette: 17 hours
Number of cigarettes Ross has had since then: one billion
Hours spent traveling without proper sleep: 32 hours
Jet-Lag pills consumed: 8
Number of train rides: 1
Speed of train ride: 300 km an hour
Cities visited thus far: 4 (Seattle, New York, Paris, Lyon)
Curses mumbled while carrying my heavy pack combined with sore tootsies: unmesurable
Number of times I've snapped at Ross because my feet hurt: way too many
Ross smiles due to the nictotine in his system

Hours spent in Paris: 6
Drinks while there: 5
Number of berets spotted on Frenchmen: 5
Number of police sirens heard so far: too many to count
Number of semi-automatic machine guns seen: 10
Number of times I tucked my skirt into my thong and paraded my bare ass for all in the bar to see: 1 (and it was enough)
Times I've thought that I prefer Lyon to Paris: several
Attempts made to order delivery pizza in French: 2
Times we've visted the Wallace pub in Lyon: 4 (and all in one day)
Number of snails I've eaten: 8
Glasses of wine consumed last night: 9

No sleep for 35 hours does crazy things to you

Times I've uttered the phrase "Desole, je parle seulement un petit peu de francais": 5
Amount of goat cheese I have inadvertently ingested: 5 kilos
Times I've eaten duck so far: 3
Macarons eaten: 5 Restaurants visited: 4
Times I was mistaken for Paris Hilton: 1 (and it was enough)
Pictures taken: over 100
Times Cat has phoned the police about the noisy piano bar below us: 2
Articles of clothing bought: 1 pair of really cool boots
Articles of clothing lost: 1 (my scarf)
Times I've admired the chic and simple style of the French: every five minutes or so
Hours of sleep we will get tonight before we have to catch our plane to Amsterdam: 4
Hangovers: 1

Number of times I have to pinch myself in order to realize where I am: a million

Defiling Paris property


M said...

Merry Xmas - and I totally enjoyed Lyon more than Paris when I went - even though Paris is exquisite! Have you tried the chocolate crepes they sell on the streets? Delish!

Kass said...

Yay France! Have a great trip and keep the hangovers coming (they make the trips even more interesting!) Merry Christmas!!!!

Indiana said...

~LOL~ Nothing says you are a Canadian like a falg on your's probably the truest stereotype I know. ~grin~

Have fun getting drunk this holiday season.

Vegas Princess said...

Even with the hangover, lack of sleep and horrible travel you are still having a better Christmas than I.

simon said...

merry christmas!...

Wanderlusting said...

Yeah Indy, we wear the flag not out of patriotism but because we don't want to be mistaken for Australians, mate.

almost famous kiwi said...

Getting mistaken for an Aussie is quite insulting isnt it! I know, it happens every bloody day. No offence aussies, its just that a kiwi can only take so much of people asking "So NZ, thats part of Australia right"
Anyways, Merry Christmas! Joyeux Noel! J'espère que vous avez de joyeuse fetes!

Anonymous said...

I am so so jealous. I love paris!!

Memphis Steve said...

Well blow me down and call me Alice, when was the last time you were actually at home? Merry Christmas and happy hangover!

Kass said...

When are you going to updaaaate? Oh and why is your pack so small, how can you fit all your stuff in it?

QueVivaBarcelona said...


This is totally unrelated to anything, but can you tell me what programme you used when you taught in Spain? I'm thinking of going back and I think that's how I'm going to try to make some cash.


amanda jane said...

oooohhh, my sister LOVED being in Lyon...too bad you guys didn't chit chat more the other day... Have lotsa fun, be nice to ross and Happy Holidays to you!!

Anonymous said...

Bon Jour (Soir?) Wanderlust - I came across this blog gadget and naturellement thought of you!

Enjoy the trip!

Xavio said...

You went less than 100km from Valence without telling me :'(

I'm saaaaaaddddd

Expat Traveler said...

looks like a lot of fun! I'm so jealous, would love to be traveling again.. Geeze it's been since Aug 2005! I can't wait till I'm aloud to escape...