You lose some, you win some

Thursday morning I woke up and was immediately faced with the odd goal of "How to look like a bride."

The night before, my agent called and gave me more of a low-down on the situation. Ken Kwapis, the director of Licence to Wed, which is now officially re-shooting in Vancouver, wanted to meet with me at 10:30AM at the Vancouver Film Studios, and I was to bring headshots and a resume. My agent advised me to not show up in a wedding dress (damn!), but to wear something "upscale casual" and have my hair and makeup done like it was my wedding.

Right. My wedding. See, hard enough as it is to believe, I've never been the kind of girl to plan out my wedding...I have no idea where it would be (though my parents have this strange notion that I will be getting married at the Royal Vancouver Yacht Club and that I would be dropped off there by my dad's sailboat...keep dreaming Dad), haven't given much thought to the dress and definitely have no idea what my hair and makeup would be like. I didn't want to jinx myself.

So it was a bit odd to find myself pondering how I wanted to look for my fake wedding...it reminded me of getting ready for Graduation.

I settled on putting my hair up (like above, left) and attaching a fancy hairpeice to make the bun more elaborate and went with subtle makeup. And by subtle I mean, I was wearing a lot of makeup, it just didn't look like it. I even had on believable false lashes. I always thought that because I did go to Makeup School For Film and TV at Vancouver Film School, that I would be able to do my face myself.

Nuh-uh. No matter how good you are at doing your make-up, I would advise leaving your face to the proffesionals on that day.

So, off I was to the film studios, with rudimentary headshots in hand (I just printed out a recent B&W picture of me, I hadn't had headshot done since I foolishly wanted to be an actress, about 6 years ago). I didn't even bother with a resume since I don't have any real acting experience and I didn't think they would be impressed with my journalism background.

I arrived at the production office to find another girl waiting there. Soon she was joined by another girl...the two girls knew each other from other extra work and were soon chatting away.

I felt out of place. Not only because I didn't know them, but they both looked similar.

They both had blue eyes, square jaws, light hair...and biggish noses. I'm not being catty but I did start to feel like I stood out...though not neccesarily in a good way. They had the look of just your average pretty girl...albeit with big boobs....and they reminded me of servers at Earls or any other sort of semi-trendy restaurant. Then there was me, with my hair up, my petite ski-jump nose, small face and brown eyes.

After waiting for quite awhile (turns out there was a fourth girl, but she never showed), we were called into Ken's office.

He was a pleasant, happy-looking guy and not one of those intimidating film directors, which was great. He shook our hands, took our pics from us and then informed us that he was basically just going to stare at us for a minute or two and then we would be on our way.

Ready, set, STARE!

That was pretty much the extent of the interview. He talked to us, but the other girls seemed to embrace it more and were more animated. I felt like I really didn't belong there. The only thing that I got excited about was the fact that he seemed to stare at me for a pretty long time...though that's not always a good thing. On the plus side, it was judging us purely on our faces. We never even had to take off our coats so he never knew how un-skinny I was.

Then we were sent on our way. On the drive home I thought about reasons things could go in my favour or not. My hair was up, more bridal style and I had a white coat on, again, more bridal, where as the other girls had dark coats. I had a prettier face, more innocent looking, but not as "sexy" as the other girls. Then again, the other girls looked a lot alike and maybe that's the look he was after. I also didn't have a resume, so perhaps I wouldn't be remembered so well.

What an odd thing to be worried about, when you think about it. Did I look more bride-worthy than the other two?

Anyway, an hour later my agent called and informed me that I did NOT have the part. I felt utterly dissapointed, more than I thought I would. I wanted to wear that bloody dress, damnit!

But...

She then went on to say that the director liked me and wants to use me in Licence to Wed on Monday as either a waitress or a bar patron. The wage too is higher than what extra's normally get so that was an added bonus...maybe it's more than just background work? Plus, I reminded myself that out of all the Extras/Actressses in Vancouver, he chose me and three other girls.

That's got to count for something.

So I guess it worked out. Being a bride will have to wait until one day when some guy is stupid enough to marry me, but hey, I can easily play a person in a bar. And I still might be able to stalk Jim from The Office ( I really should find out his real name).

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In other news, I am so sick of gaining weight for no apparent reason (other than the fact that I eat like my boyfriend but can't afford to) and feeling like a slug that I have taken a proactive approach and signed up for Cardio Core Bootcamp.

Yes, I did sign up for it before but they never got in contact with me. This time, they have to...they have my deposit. They owe it to me to whip my ass into shape and make me feel like Jodie Foster running the obstacle course in Silence of the Lambs until tears are running down my face and drill sargeants are screaming in my ears. I've also started jogging...but I'm finding that since I am soooo out of shape, it is an extremely long learning curve. An extremely long, painful, limping, wheezing learning curve.

Nonetheless, I plugged away at it for an hour today and hopefully, with time, can build up enough stamina to go the distance. I just want to be proud of my body and not ashamed of it, and yes even though I did lose 18 pounds (and now gained 10 back) last year due to the South Beach Diet an NO excercise, I just want to get fit, get tone and feel strong. And no diet can do that alone.

So here's to new oppurtunities and getting off my fat ass!